things that i’m amused by right this second.

i am not a virgo.]

yes, it’s oldish. but i’m laughing at it right now. again. i just can’t help it. this is the human being to whom you can actually say, “stop squawking, you twit!” and get away with it. she is a silly silly twitlady, and after watching this (regularly), i’ve decided that i find her endearing. which is NOT to say that she wouldn’t be on my “top 5 celebrities to kill” list. because she wouldn’t be. if i were to have such a list. which i don’t.
i have a friend who DOES have such a list, however, and le dion is on it. right behind carrot top. but to me, carrot top isn’t so much a celebrity as much as he is someone who just shouldn’t be alive.
so this isn’t so much something that i’m laughing at right this second as it is something that i will laugh at forever. loudly.

and i think my favorite thing about this video is the link to the creator’s other videos. like, shutupihatemyself does a brilliant video about the ridiculousness of the beyonce experience, which has led me to conclude, that if i gave enough of a shit, i would put her on my kill list, because while celine dion comes off as zany and a little bit off, beyonce is a hideous self-obsessed douchette.
and so i ventured further. checked out his video about his cats eating. laughed my ass off for three minutes. but then i realized holy shit, this is just a video of his cats eating. this is not meant to be hilarious because that cat looks like he got shovel-faced. this is “funny” because the cats will eat ANYTHING. including, but i’m SURE not limited to: houseplants! chopsticks! paper bags! their own cat food! HA! HAHAHAHAHA!
and i felt dumb. but also lucky to have witnessed the accidental genius of the celine masterpiece. because seriously, wow.

and then, look! this!

this is my easter hat.
we’re going to go ahead and call this “this is my easter hat.” and it is silly. this doesn’t really apply to me, though. my friends and i went to a holiday party and there were a whole lot of people dressed up in bear suits. nobody could see their eyes, and they were bad dancers. and the inside of those heads really stink.

and then we have this shiny shiny gem:


no. i do not particularly like katie holmes. i will go against the general public to say that i really did like her fashionable little suriesque bobbob that she had for about a day and a half, but aside from that, i can’t really be bothered with her. i don’t care for her husband, nor do i care for his performance in war of the worlds. or vanilla sky. or eyes wide shut. though had i caught his appearance as “guy on couch” on third rock from the sun, i probably would have laughed my ass off.
but seriously. look at this fucking bag. and she’s not being ironic! look at this fucking bag!

i am sighing satisfiededly.

oh and also, nick’s middle name is louis.
if you say his name together and pronounce it like you would “michaelangelo,” it’s HIlarious.
nicholASlouis. HA.


2 Responses to “things that i’m amused by right this second.”

  1. I’m pretty sure that’s the bag they made a whole SATC episode about…you know, the one with the 5 year waiting list jsut to touch it? Correct me if I’m wrong, but that bag looks JUST LIKE the bag that tore Lucy Liu and Samantha apart for good.

    Really? You’d choose THAT bag over Lucy Liu? I mean….if that’s what you want…

  2. you are correct, my eagle-eyed friend. that is, indeed, the hermes birkin.
    however, it comes in many sizes, depending on the number of cow deaths you’d prefer to be personally responsible for. katie here opted for the “i can afford the entire farm, so why the fuck not?” model while samantha/liu scratched each other’s eyes out over “the medium shit load.”

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